WORLD MUSIC CONTEST 2009

Disappoinment


Just woke up and I saw Baobao's message. I should be happy about it, after all I waited for one whole day. But why am I so unhapppy now? He didn't reply me because he was tired. Tired because he was busy helping someone. First he was negative about this girl then now he says she's good. What a huge change and I really cannot digest what's happening.

I had a bad dream. A real bad one. A repeatition of history. But it was me this time. I don't know why I had it but, it just made me feel so moody now! And receiving his message is just so depressing. He didn't even know today is my big day. I don't want to reply him anymore.

One whole day, and that...
I feel so sad right now.

I haven't even wash up and I have SO MUCH in my mind I had to write it out. I can't feel better. I told myself to switch to competition mode once I wake up. But I think my system is a little screwed up now.

That girl.<
Pretty, cute, funny and a good girl.
I'm...

I want my daddy and mummy.


SHIT


Somehow I feel the words you say didn't mean anything.

Now the time is almost 12pm in the afternoon, which is almost 6 in the evening for you. My compeition starts at 10am here which is 4pm in Singapore. SO when is your good luck message gonna come? Like I always say, don't promise things you cannot do. I waited until the last minute before I had to turn off my phone and still nothing. NOTHING!

I'm so UNHAPPY right now. I feel so SHIT!

I performed worse than usual and IT SUCKED! I almost cried. No matter how I try the sounds just wouldn't come out. I feel so disappointed with myself. I'm really not up to it. Though I heard that the audience and one of the judge stood up and applaud for us but I still think we're far from GOLD. We're now back in the hostel and will be going back at 4pm to receive our result. I feel so URGHHHH!

It's really my worse day of my life! I got blister! And I spoiled my box where I put my important stuff. Then I lost my precious comb. And I JUST HATE EVERYTHING HERE! I hate being here. I want to go back now.

And YOU!
T_________T







No better.


Oldies


Guess all the oldies are a little disappointed with the contest.
They're all emo-ing in the room.
Maybe they're having an evaluation.
But well, it's over already.
We're not expecting too much.

Everyone went out to tour around the town.
I stayed in the hostel because I didn't want to go anywhere.
I have no mood to go anywhere and I'm lazy to go anywhere.

I guess I'm tired.
I really want to go home.

And I just received his message.
He really forgotten about me.
Well, a good enough reason.

I didn't expect any better excuse anyway.
Whatever.


A little Peace


Louis and Lookit kept taking turns to come into my room and asked me out to eat some of the food they bought. Guess they were worried I would feel lonely. Actually I was but I could manage. Still, they were really adorable. =) I really like them. A bunch of good guys.

All from SAF central Band. LOL! How I wish I could go there.

I'm back on my bed slacking and talking to my beloved keke.
I just love being alone and having my private time.
This band is too noisy for me.

It's good that they are not here now. =)


End of Conversation


Just back from dinner and before that we went back to get our results. We got 83.67 if I'm not wrong. And we're currently ranked 12th out of 14 bands. So loser. But considering our age and experience, it's very impressive already. We read our comments and many were very encouraging.

Still I am quite disappointed because I believed we could do better. There were alot bands getting 90 over. This competition is madness. Some were so close to 100. Gosh. But overall I was quite satisfied because I expected 70 plus when listening to our music. Able to get an 80 plus is good enough for me already.

------------------------------

I was so DAMN upset with Baobao and I almost cried while messaging him. He's just so... heck care... I feel so terrible right now. He doesn't know how much I miss home. He just laughed it off. He didn't think my anxiety level could be like 10/10 now. He doesn't know my level of tolerance in being away from home. I don't leave home as much as he do. I just cannot take it. Like Baobao said. I'm DAMN home sick. But he's not sensitive to it. I want to go home so badly. When I tell my section mates, my tears are rolling in my eyes. I really cannot stand being away from home for so long.

I want to see my parents.