Feel so down.
Done so much yet, I really think I shouldn't try so hard to be someone else.
I'm a little lost.
But I will pick myself back up again.
A little less loved.
These few days I just want to stay home.
I don't want to go anywhere else.
I just want to go home, stay home.
Besides school, it will be home.
I want to be in my parents' arms.
At least they are the ones that will give me unconditional love and concern every minute and second.
I am a baby, I know. BUT I won't change it.
Because I know I can afford to be one.
I was nowhere today. Not literally nowhere but I don't know where I was heading to, what I want to do and such. I used to be 24/7 on the phone. Sms-ing or calling. But today, I was walking everywhere aimlessly. Apple, JieYing and Yihuan went home and Deffany was lost somewhere. She said to meet her at the sports complex but when I reached there she was still not there.
Called Baobao but he was playing dota and his phone no money. So, I went to cheers to buy something for the sake of buying. Seriously, I was wandering in the retail outlet for quite some time then I decided to buy chocolate and yogurt drink. Since I walked into the place, I just want to buy something.
I had band audition today. I scored 74/100. Quite happy, but I know I could do better. Just that I was too nervous and I was really shaking hard after my turn to play the first piece. But the second piece was better. Still, second piece was more difficult. Well, but I'm glad I could still pull through the audition without any good luck wishes from anyone. I took out my phone every few mintues to see if there was any changes in my screen. I know it was plain dumb. But I decided to turn it off to prevent myself from looking too stupi dwaiting for things I know will never come. Nevermind.
I passed. =)
He came to fetch me at the train station and we had dinner at his dad's workplace with his mum. After eating, he sent me home.
Brother's girlfriend came over to my house. She still wasn't going home after 12 midnight and my brother was sleeping. Mummy got really worried and she kept urging my brother to send her home. But after awhile, they came up with a lame excuse saying she didn't have the keys to go home. And her parents are asleep already. I mean, at least think of a better excuse can? LOL!
Then I had deja vu. I remembered I encountered this situation before. Nevermind, but I know now it was a horribly lousy reason to not go home and I had a taste of my own hell. So, I'm better now. =)
Soon, as my parents began to see her reluctance to go home, they blew up and gosh, I had never seen my parents grow mad at outsiders. They lectured her and my brother, and as they continue to scold, they became more and more impatient and soon sounded almost like chasing her out of the house.
I tried to be nice and acted as a peacekeeper and went to convince my brother to send her home. When I was convincing him, I really feel like I was somehow also talking to myself. Well, I managed to get them moving and by then, daddy mummy was very angry already.
What I find it most amusing was, they keep asking her to go home, even to the extent they wanted ME to send her home since my brother didn't want to. Not only that, each time they failed to get the answer they want, which was her going home, they would come into my room and disturb me with questions I couldn't answer. They would ask, 'can't she call her sister up?', 'she should have gone home early since she doesn't have the key right?'. I would have attempted to answer but I can't because I am not her. My parents are so cute la. It was as though my room was the reflection room. They had to come in every few minutes to vent their frustrastion and ask stupid questions before going back to lecturing them.
Seriously, my brother also no brain. Shouldn't the guy be very protective of his girlfriend and do things with her best interest at heart? I mean, since she is a girl and all girls are babies of their parents; like me, he should bring her home no matter what. And he have the responsibility to maintain her reputation and her image she portrays to her parents and our parents. Now her parents would be worried sick and my parents are unhappy with her. I'm sure her points are now negative after a good scolding. How to save this kind of situation?
My brother should be the one helping her do the right things. And not encourage her to do things that will affect the others who cares about her. Plus, they are just together for not even a month. Guys are brainless I guess.
Well, now is the period of detente and nobody is coming into my room anymore tonight. LOL! After they left the house, my dad's mood changed very instantly and came into my room to ask if I have money to eat for tomorrow. So random. HAHA!
They finally could sleep in peace. I doubt my brother's girlfriend is going to come again anytime soon. Sigh, this kind of unhappiness just before our family chalet.
